An old fashioned concept that seems to be coming back is waiting until marriage to have sex. It is a very romantic notion and has a lot of advantages: There is no need to worry about getting infected with a sexually transmitted disease. There are no unwanted or unplanned pregnancies to deal with and it keeps people from misinterpreting a casual relationship as something else.
The concept is coming back but is not completely back or accepted by everybody. Actually there are more people who think that it is irresponsible to wait until marriage to have sex. The argument is that there is no way to know if two people are sexually compatible until they have sex. This would hint at the fact that they also believe that if sexual compatibility is missing from a relationship the relationship is doomed to fail, or at the very least be very unfulfilling .
When a relationship gets very serious and seems headed for marriage a lot of people decide that the time is right to become sexual with each other. Taking the relationship to this level of intimacy generally strengthens the bond between the couple and they find themselves feeling closer than ever. There is one exception to this scenario that can cause the exact opposite to happen, leaving the couple to wonder what went wrong and if it can be fixed. It also makes them re-think getting married to each other.
All the buildup and all the anticipation that leads up to sex does not prepare any couple for the crashing let down of a disappointing sexual encounter. Most of the time it will come as a surprise given how much chemistry they felt, and if they did a lot of making out and had other intimate encounters they would automatically expect having sex with each other to exceed their wildest wet dreams. Naturally most people will not just give up after one or two unsatisfying rolls in the hey, but if it becomes obvious to one of them that they are feeling frustrated and unsatisfied after every time they have sex with this person, they start to wonder if they might not just have found a deal breaker.
Bad sex is only a deal breaker if the person who is not satisfying the other is not willing to listen to what is wrong and be able to give insight to why it’s like that. It can be lack of experience or just a lack of knowing what that person wants. It can also just be a coincidence that the few times that they were together there was a medical condition going on and it, or the medications taken for it, inhibited the experience in some way.
If the reason for bad sex stems from one person’s lack of desire or need for sexual intimacy, and they acknowledge that they have always been that way and don’t see themselves changing in the future, or even wanting to, it is not a good sign. This person’s reasoning is not going to change once they are married. It will likely get much worse and to the point that they rarely if ever have sex. And even when they do they will not give their spouse what they need. This is one of those red flags that should be seen as a deal breaker before it has a chance to be a reason for divorce.