Almost every person who has ever started dating someone who they got really in to has found themselves in the situation of not knowing what to say or what not to say about how they feel about that person. It may have been something small and sudden that brought about a rush of emotion that caught them off guard. It also could have been something that gained momentum after a few times of seeing this person, that made the emotion harder to contain each time that person was anywhere near. However it happened, it became very clear that there was something begging to be said, but could not be for fear of rejection.
Saying the three little words “I love you”, is one of the biggest topics of interest in the world wide sport of dating. This dating dilemma is addressed in everything from books to movies, and even with all the information on the subject floating around there are still a lot of unanswered questions. Saying these words is a big deal because they can, and do ruin a lot of potential long term relationships.
With all the things to worry about in the first few weeks or months of being with a new person, expressing how you feel about them should be the last thing to cause a problem. Telling someone you love them is the utmost of compliments and a big statement of admiration and appreciation for who they are, and for how they make you feel. Yet these words have been associated with so many negative hidden messages that they seem to have lost their true meaning and morphed into a dating taboo. To dispel any confusion that may be linked to this declaration, follow your heart and these rules of thumb:
1. Keep your perspective on the situation. Everybody is unique and individual so it makes sense that the way they feel things is their own, but real love does have to come from a certain amount of knowledge about the person you think you love. If you have truly only spent minutes or hours speaking with the person you feel you love, chances are you don’t love them, you love things about them.
2. Strive for balance in what you share and when you share it. There is no rule that says you have to share every thought and feeling with somebody as soon as you think it or feel it. As soon as you think you’re at a point of feeling more intensely about the person you are seeing, just enjoy it for a while with yourself. Hold on to it and make sure that it feels the same way the next few times you see this person, and is not just a feeling stemming from a particularly fun or exciting time you had with them.
3. Take a good look at what could follow after you make your feelings known. Being in love with someone usually indicates an expectation of a more serious commitment. Make sure you both are willing and able to go there before leading it there.
4. If you are in love you should be able to express that. Telling someone you love them should be a positive experience, but if it isn’t, it is probably a good idea to reevaluate the relationship and your place in it.